6 Tips for Creating a Resilient Relationship

resilient couple

Making your relationship healthy, strong, and resilient helps you weather the hard times in life

Have you ever wondered why some relationships endure even the most challenging times, while others become distant and full of conflict? What makes these relationships different? Are there certain factors that promote a healthy, strong, and resilient relationship? We believe there are some key factors that will help you and your partner foster resiliency and increase your likelihood of weather challenging times.

Here are six keys to a resilient relationship-


Being available and responsive to each other’s needs
It is important to take time each day as a couple to listen to your partner.  Debrief on how the day was for each of you, things you are excited about, and areas you are struggling with and need support. Also, what you are needing from your partner with juggling the responsibilities of life such as picking up the kids, dry cleaning, or picking up dinner to go.

Telling stories about how you’ve overcome difficult circumstances as a couple
Remembering and sharing with each other how you’ve overcome difficult times and how you came together as a couple reinforces hope in the relationship. You each can remember times that drew you together and helped you get stronger.

Facing your fears and sharing your needs as a couple
Being able to be vulnerable and share your fears with each other is necessary to building a supportive relationship. It can be difficult to share our fears and we need to provide a safe environment for our partner and let them know we will not judge them.

couple carousel

Investing in memories and activities that remind you how important you are to each other
Take time to engage in activities that you enjoy doing together. When you have fun together it builds the bond between you. It reminds you why you fell in love with each other in the beginning.

Repairing hurts or misunderstandings quickly
It is crucial to repair hurts or misunderstandings quickly. The longer we wait to resolve conflicts the more distance it creates in our relationship and the harder it can be to overcome our hurt feelings. Being able to accept responsibility for your actions and the willingness to forgive are keys to being able to repair disagreements.

Communicating worth to each other and seeing purpose in your relationship
Let your partner know how much you appreciate them. Doing this on a frequent basis reminds your partner that you care for them and value their contribution to your relationship.


Create a strong foundation to help you weather life’s difficult times together
These characteristics will help you and your partner foster resiliency in your relationship and create a strong foundation. Meaningful and supportive relationships help us overcome the difficult times knowing we are important and have a partner who has our back. Successful relationships do not come easily, however. They require communication and cooperation during both the good and challenging times. These six characteristics will increase the likelihood of your relationship rebounding after hardships large and small.

Carlene Lehmann, M.A., LMFT is a Marriage and Family Therapist at Relationships Matter Austin in Austin, Texas. Carlene can help you build a strong foundation, so you can work as a team during difficult situations. To schedule your appointment with Carlene, you can reach her at (512) 994-0432 or request an appointment with her on the Relationships Matter Austin Scheduling Page.