Your First Therapy Session: Know What to Expect

by Carlene Lehmann, M.A., LMFT

Spicewood office

Welcome! We are so glad you are here. Come in and make yourself comfortable.

Beginning your journey in therapy


The decision to attend therapy is not made lightly. It
probably took months or even years to accept that therapy might be able to help
you. You most likely spent time looking into different therapists to find the
right fit for your needs and comfort level. Congratulations, the hardest part
is done!  You’re now ready to head to
your first session and begin your journey toward healing and wellness.

How to get the most out of therapy sessions 

Now that all the arrangements are made, let’s talk about ways to get the most out of your therapy experience. This may seem a silly topic, since many people believe the therapist leads sessions, but you don’t want to start a therapeutic relationship without first knowing how we will work together. Understanding what the therapist will expect from you and what effort you need to put in will help you achieve the results you want.

Providing a
supportive and confidential environment so you can be open

Remember that your therapist is a trained professional. They
not only have an education to support your needs, but also experience with
various strengths and weaknesses. Don’t be embarrassed to share your secrets in
the safe space of therapy, and please don’t assume your worse than others. Your
therapist has most likely seen, heard, and worked with many of the struggles
you present to him and or her, and they are ready and wanting to help you heal.

The therapy process
is a collaboration between client and therapist

speech bubble

Don’t float through therapy being led solely by your therapist. Therapy is a mutual working relationship between therapist and client. Be certain to present your personal goals and ambitions to your therapist so he or she can help tailor sessions and assignments to meet those goals.  Remember, there is very little that a therapist hasn’t heard or worked with, so don’t be embarrassed to mention your true goals, no matter how odd they may seem to others. That being said, also be sure to share your deepest feelings with your therapist. Working toward goals often times requires a processing of emotions, and who better to process them with than your therapist?

Bring the goals you
have for therapy. The work is your journey and your therapist is there to
support you.


The work you do in therapy will be focused on the goals you have. Take some time to think about what your goals are for coming to therapy at this point in your life. The therapeutic work is yours to do and your therapist is there to support and encourage you along the way. Your therapist will create assignments and help you break down your true feelings and desires, but it will be up to you to do the work outside of the sessions. You will need to try new behaviors, change thought patterns that no longer serve you, and improve relationships. Your therapist can’t do that work for you. If you feel like therapy isn’t working, let your therapist know. It can be helpful to reflect throughout the therapy process on what your needs are and let your therapist know if you feel stuck or confused.

Remember your

During and after each session, and especially during and
after a particularly hard session, be sure to remind yourself that you have
strengths. The role of a therapist is to break down our defenses and destroy
our façade to help us build a new image and lifestyle. As such, there will be
some sessions that feel overwhelming, leaving us in a sense of guilt or shame.
If that happens, remember that you are processing your faults to improve your
strengths. List your strengths for yourself to increase a much needed self
esteem and remember that more personal strengths will come as self-improvement continues.

You are worth seeking
support. Your wellbeing is important and the foundation for your relationships.


Finally, remember that you are worth it. Despite all the faults you may admit and process with your therapist, remember that you are worth improvement and happiness. Remind yourself that we all have faults and we all have secrets, but there is not one person who is unworthy of love and care. Therapy may feel daunting and uncomfortable, but pushing through that to achieve the life you deserve is worth all the work.